Fibs Bog Standard

Written for https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2024/01/26/fibbing-friday-26th-january/

1. “A few sandwiches short of a picnic”

When the scouts and guides go on a camping trip, and they forget to pack the sandwiches.
2. “Bagsy”

When the oldest child carries the bag, they get the chocolate that is left over.
3. “Bog-standard

A toilet seat, made of plastic, and the cheapest one in the DIY store.
4. “Budge up’’

A budgie on a swing will say this to their mate if they are hogging all the room on the ledge.
5. “Chinwag’’

When someone is overweight, and they laugh.
6. “Faff’’

The forms you have to fill out when you file a self assessment tax return.
7. “Full Monty”

A type of breakfast with eggs, sausages, bacon, beans, mushrooms, hash browns and two slices of fried bread. You have no room for any other food when you’re done.
8. “Give me a tinkle on the blower”

Little Jack Horner used the blower when he needed to contact his children. They were terrible at keeping in touch.
9. “On it like a car bonnet”

A mechanic’s mantra when they fix your car. Mostly they are from London, and it will end in mate.
10. “Tickety-boo”

A witch’s outing, where they buy tickets to Thorpe Park or Alton Towers (Theme park for anyone not in the UK). Halloween rides, and bobbing for apples is their favourite treat of October.